Having a crush is birth right of a man and at least I ,till date have tried my best to utilize it to the fullest :). People talk about big things like unselfish, platonic, genuine etc. etc. types of loves, which I have no knowledge of, however I swear to Romeo-Juliette, Laila-Majanu, Heer-Ranjha, Raj-simran etc. etc. that all my crushes have been truly sincere and genuine ones :) (please don’t ask me to define what’s a genuine crush now) although all these numerous crushes flying high like a brave eagle at their peak, finally crashed into an humble, helpless popats. But still, that does not deny me my birth right to have crush again and I keep paying my duties as a responsible citizen fully aware of my rights..
As it happens with most of us around, as far as I can remember, it all started in school. My first crush was my school teacher. In that age when you are oblivious of what you look to find in a feminine company; I was in awe of her sweetness and the fact that she was the only teacher who had spared me of punishments which I always deserved being one of the naughtiest kids. But, I guess, this chapter didn’t take long to get over as after few months, I never saw her in school. Later, I came to know that she was just a temporary teacher who had replaced one of the teachers who was on her maternity leave. Nevertheless, this marked the beginning of the crush – crash cat mouse game in my life :)
No sooner was the first tremor over, than a new one hit. She was my new classmate. I don’t really remember whether she was beautiful or not or rather I was too small to understand this aspect, but one thing was for sure that I simply loved her smile, her loud laughs, her standing first in every exam, her coming to school in a car, everything would just add oxygen to my breaths. Her pony tail, her school bag, her water bottle, pencils ,easers, sharpeners, literally everything seemed worth Gold to me. This cute little obsession did continue for quite a while, till we shifted our home and hence my school and as I would do number of times again, I had to move on.
The saga continued in bits and pieces throughout high school as well. I won’t really be talking about all but one. I am sure everyone’s adolescence whether man or a woman would have such velvety moments to share, no matter how much he or she tries to live in a state of denial. Ok, enough of philosophy, that’s never been my cup of tea :), let’s come to the point, those days, I was flying high with my brand new Hero Jet cycle which my father bought me as it was the cheapest option those days. Every day, going to school riding my bicycle was no less than a feeling of being in a Mercedes Benz. And bang!!!!, one day through by lanes of the school, I saw her delicately and carefully riding her even more beautiful BSA Lady Bird.. (Yes, gone are the good old days of Hero jets and Lady Birds, I wish I had a time machine:(). She was simply amazing, extremely fair, almost with a milk like complexion, had a very fashionable hair cut for a small town like ours, her shoe socks, nail paint, ear rings, bangles, everything matching her school uniform (hmm, I believe, when God created woman, he created her with one inherent quality – “The Fashion sense”). I took a second or two to come back to senses. I just felt like butterflies flying all around. The day marked the start of few radical changes. I started being extra careful about getting my uniform ironed well, neatly oiling and combing hair, brushing teeth extra clean, wiping and polishing shoes every other day. I would every now and then find an excuse to get out of classroom and wander in the veranda so that whenever I would pass her classroom, I would get a glimpse of hers because she used to sit in different classroom due to late admission. But I could never find words to talk to her. All my fruitless attempts to approach her always failed as my guts and my courage always eluded me owing much to my typically conservative middleclass Maharashtrian upbringing and even more conservative and the strictest school in the town where even talking to someone of opposite sex was considered a taboo . AS everything was going like middle overs in an One day match, suddenly started the powerplay of slog overs and we were engulfed by a daemon of SSC exams (These exams always kill the most precious days in our lives). There was absolutely no time for anything but papers, scores, results and futile merit list competitions. And as I secured admission to junior college, I had no new of hers except for the fact that she stood 3rd in the School. After some casual inquiries, I found that she moved to some bigger city may be Pune or Mumbai for further education ending my another longish loyal crush and leaving me wondering what if I was never as shy and prudish?
(To be Continued..)