Saturday, January 26, 2013

Confessions of an ITwallah - New girl in the team

Just as I am contemplating my total insignificance and complete lack of importance in the project, staring at huge number of unread e-mails in the outlook, I hear whispering sighs from my neighbor. I  look around and spot Rashmi, looking from the corner of her thick glasses towards the hot chic in the front cubicle. Rashmi seems to have put on a dejected era on her face. I look at the hot chic,she is talking jovially with Sumit. They seem to be bonding quite well over a loud conversation. Well, Sumit is a tall, dark and (not so) handsome guy in our development team. He is the guy whom Rashmi secretly admires. Rashmi's sighs grow heavier as their conversation grows louder.

Suddenly Maddy, the junior most member in our team starts singing in a very low voice
"Here comes the Dog, here comes the dog.."
Startled, I look at him interrogatively.
He points at the entrance in the remote corner. I see Chhagan approaching, shaking his heavy belly and carrying laptop bag on one elephant sized shoulder. Chhagan, being a manager has reserved the privilege of working out of the office in city and once in two weeks he visits the labor force where we sit, the place around 20 miles from the city. Practically, everyone in the team finds his presence utterly irritating. Just as he approaches closer, I can see a petite, fair,a little more fashionably made up girl, dressed in a rather skimpy cloths following him. Rashmi raises her eyebrows a little higher than usual, Maddy opens her mouth wide and starts licking his dried lips.

Chhagan slowly comes and greets us all and then introduces the girl as Amruta, a new member of the testing team. Then he takes her to the development team and repeats the ritual. Whilst she shakes hand with Sumit, Rashmi's fury up-scales.

Amruta reclines in an empty cubicle, playing with her hair. Just as she tries to re-lax, a manager from some team, we don't have anything to do with goes to her and introduces himself and shakes her hand for a little longer than usual. Then, there starts a flurry of sexually starved creatures from our floor peeping at and some of them without any reason introducing themselves to the new object of their secret desires. I imagine a single sugar-cube in a kitchen that's full of ants.

"All men are a big cesspool..", I hear Rashmi muttering agonizingly.

Suddenly, Chhagan pats me .

"So, Chaitanya, we have this new requirement to be tested within one week. Go through it and provide me with an estimate in next two hours. Involve Maddy as well."

There are hardly any 'could you' or 'please' when he speaks to subordinates. I fail to understand that if something has already been slated to be completed in one week, why it would need an estimate.

I turn to Maddy. He's finding it hard to keep his eyes off the new entrant. I nudge him and say..

"Chhagan wants us to provide the estimates for this new requirement.."

He hardly sounds interested and with his eyes fixed where they were, he casually replies

"Ghantaa..... Ask him to rather estimate his mouth against my dick", and he bursts out into a wicked laughter..

I also join in and then bear with huge number of abuses and curses hurled at Chhagan.

Rashmi finds it unbearable though and gets up, calls Amruta and both head towards Wash room.

I quietly start preparing that estimate document. Maddy is still not out of her awe.

After a while, Rashmi comes in and sits, her somber mood seems to have dissipated and a wry smile starts playing around her lips.

"She's a real corporate airy snob." She announces.

And then she exclaims,

"Guys, a real bad news for you all."
"What?"
"She's happily married. Her husband is a senior project manager in our company itself. Moreover, he's a friend of Chhagan, and with his very reference, she has joined our project, so, hard luck and better luck for future" ,and she blinks her one eye and starts observing Sumit again admiringly.

"All these sons of bitch managers are damn fuckingly lucky..", announces Maddy and continues chatting with his friend on communicator.

I keep dreaming of getting promotion at least this time and click the send button in outlook to present the estimates to Chhagan...

1 comment:

Mandar Kulkarni said...

Funny... nicely written...