Chilmibaba's blog

Being Unwell

2011-10-08T09:19:00.000-07:00

Till now, being unwell hardly meant anything more than catching a common cold, or a bacterial throat infection or a sorry tummy. A visit to family doctor, some anti-biotic prescribed if needed, a rest for a day and I would be more than okay. This time around, I thought it would be the same story, the only difference was, I felt as if my right ear was blocked, and I could barely hear anything. I had severe cold too. Doctor diagnosed that this may be due to a sinusitis, may be a frozen mucus at the back of my ear. He prescribed some usual medicines along with some nasal drops to drain out ear blocking. Three days went by. My cold was all right, but somehow, ear did not show any improvement. Doctor seemed clueless now. He referred me to an ENT surgeon.

Going by initial checks, this ENT surgeon, too made the same assumption, and prescribed a long list of medicines for a week. If these medicines would not take any effect, I would need to undergo a small surgery, to extracts fluids deposited if any in the right ear-tube. Another week, another dose of medicines, and the same story repeated. There wasn't even slightest of improvement in my ear. In fact, now, there was little that I could hear. It was more than two weeks, and feeling of semi hearing impaired was nothing but frustrating.
Today was d-day, I stumbled into doctor's cabin. He had a worried look on his face finding no improvement in spite of extensive medication. He immediately sent me for a hearing test, 'Audio-metric test' as they call it in medical terms. It was a sound-proof room. There were a couple of headphones, some electronic meter kind of devices and an enthusiastic young intern. I was made to wear those headphones, and asked to recognise periodic beep sounds,, I don't know, for how long it carried on, I would hear some feeble sounds, indicate to intern, and he made some notes, I saw drops of sweat encircling his temple. Eventually, he scribbled a note saying "right ear - severe hearing loss, cause - unkonwn?"

Back to square one. Doctor was at his softest to and to an extent bluntest to say there are two news a good one and a bad one. Good one is - there was no fluid in ears as diagnosed before, so there was no need of any surgery. And, the bad one - my nerve from right ear to brain was severely damaged, and that's what has caused he hearing loss. and before me asking anything, he continued saying that this hearing loss is most of the time irreversible. This nerve damage has no definite cause, it may be due o a virus, a kind of infection and anything else. He would prescribe me a medicine for some days and we could just hope that I may recover, but there is no guarantee.

Phew, it was bomb after bomb on me, my hands were literally trembling.I left the hospital literally numbed. In such situations, one would have plenty of free advice to shower on others, but when it comes to your own self, believe me, it's devastating. Just an idea of having a non functional organ is horrible. More than anything else, it's the psychological battle that drains one out the most. Wow, what a gift destiny had in store for me on the occasion of Dussera.I hope she accompanies it with the strength and the courage to cope with such trauma.....

When It Rains!!!

2011-05-27T06:05:00.001-07:00

It’s 6:35 in the evening, my company bus is trudging its way on dusty highway from Hinjewadi to the city of Pune. It’s pale, excruciatingly humid, but relievingly breezy outside for a usual May evening. Inside, it’s filled up with sultry air of calm, concealing a volcanic unrest within many minds. Most of them have dozed off, some even falling unconsciously on the shoulders of their neighbors with each jerk of a pothole, some looking in blank with a Himalayan frustration residing right from temples to chins, some contemplating something obscure (US –Iraq relations may be, huh??), some may be thinking of a revenge with their TLs, PMs, etc., some may be miffed by some abstruse company policy clause which wasn’t stated to them at the time of joining, some not happy with their deployments causing live issues, some may not be happy with their defects being rejected by developers and some oblivious of all, just listening to express tweets of Radio channel RJs with headphones literally stuffed into ears. Once in a while, a girl on one of the backseats bursts out in a giggle on mobile, she disturbs the deep slumber of her neighbors, they just give her a helpless look and again doze off, she becomes suddenly conscious and starts speaking in lowest possible tone, the art only women have mastered. The bus hits Pashan-Bavadhan Road, It suddenly gets dark, cool breeze seems to be turning more valiant, the Sun seems cute while he sets, the picturesque DRDO area looks even more eye catching, I look at my old Nokia 1100 and kick myself for not having a mobile phone with camera. The lightning strikes in between sporadically, you sense it’s coming now. Faces start being lit up, not because they want it, just that home is coming closer now. I immediately start praying that let it rain once I reach home safe and sound. People start getting down slowly, some start worrying about the bus snailing itself via jam packed road, some seem to be in a hurry of life to leave the bus and reach destination in no time as if there is no tomorrow. The bus quietly advance from heavily loaded Chandni chowk overlooking numerous local politicians’ digital posters with wry smiles on their faces painted with fresh crow-shits here and there, and bang, it explodes and heavens open up, I immediately follow the precedent and shut the window. It starts coming down heavily now, people are frustrated of being caught napping, after all who would carry bunch of heavy umbrellas and rain suits on a burning May morning from home, they have no option now though, they periodically get down at their stops, look for the nearest shelter or start running, running for life, I wonder they ever had. My bus stop as an inevitability comes along, as always driver parks a little ahead, I curse him in mind and get down with a little reluctance. As I feel the rain drops striking my spectacles, for a moment I ask myself when was the last time I was literally drenched, when was the last time, I danced in the rains, but only for a moment though and suddenly someone else in me takes over that former someone, and guess what I start running, no sprinting towards shelter, running for life, I wonder I ever had?

मेंदीच्या पानावर - ३

2011-05-17T06:23:00.000-07:00

एक हातभर मिनिट्स ऑफ मीटिंग खरडले, आणि आऊटलूक मध्ये सेंड चं बटन क्लिक केलं. हुश्श, त्या इंग्रज क्लायंटाचा आत्मा थंड झाला असेल आता. बास्स, आज तसंही जास्त काम नव्हतंच, बस निघायलाही बराच वेळ होता. बाहेर चांगलंच अंधारून आलं होतं. मोठ्या खिडक्यांच्या काचांवर पावसाचे टप्पोरे थेंब हळूहळू जमा होवू लागले होते. अशा वेळेला मस्त कॉफी प्यायचा मूड होतो. तेजू ऑफलाईन दिसत होती. मी मागे वळून सागरला विचारलं

" काय रे, बिझी आहेस का?"
"नाही गं, बोल ना."
"चल मग, कॉफी घेवूया का?"
"चल "
त्या जुनाट व्हेन्डींग मशीन शी खडखडाट करत आम्ही कॉफी, खरंतर कॉफी फ्लेवर्ड मिल्क घेवून खिडकीपाशी आलो. काचेतून कोसळणारा पाऊस न्याहाळत अगदी मशिन ची कॉफी सुद्धा छान वाटते. काही मिनिटं अशीच गेली.
"तुला पावसात भिजायला आवडतं का गं?", हळूच शांतता भंग करत सागरनं विचारलं.
"अं, ह्म्म, ह्यॅ, आजिबात नाही, पाऊस नुसता पाह्त एन्जॉय करणं वेगळं, पण पावसात भिजणं म्हणजे जीवावर येतं. तुला काय आवडतं की काय?"
"ह्म्म, लहानपणीच आवडायचं, अगदी खूप. आता कुठलं परवडतंय भिजायला. कसं असतं ना, अगदी काल परवापर्यंत हवाहवासा वाटणारा पाऊस जेव्हा एकदम irritating वाटायला लागतो ना, तेव्हा मान्य करावं की आपण म्हातारे होत आहोत."
"हम्म.."
"ए , तुझ्याबरोबर रोज कॅन्टीन मध्ये कोण सॉलिड आयटम असते गं?", अचानक सागरने डोळा मारत विचारलं
एकदम पहिल्या गिअर वरून चवथ्या गिअर वर जावं असं काहीसं मला वाटलं.
"का रे? बरंच लक्ष असतं साहेबांचं. बाय द वे, ती सुद्धा मला विचारत होती, तुझ्या बाजूला कोण तो ढापण्या बसलेला असतो, मोठमोठ्याने फोनवर ओरडत? " मीही चेष्टेच्या मूडमध्ये येत म्हणाले.
"अरे वा, ढापण्या तर ढापण्या, निदान एखाद्या सुंदर मुलीने दखल तर घेतली. ह्या कंपनीत राहिल्याचं सार्थक झालं म्हणायचं, आता मी सुखाने डोळे मिटायला मोकळा."
काहीही असलं तरी ह्याचा खेळकरपणा मात्र वाखाणण्यासारखा होता.
"बरं झालं, कंपनीवरून आठवलं, मी तुला सांगितलं का गं?"
"नाही, काय?"
"अगं मी पेपर टाकलाय. सध्या नोटीस पिरीयड सुरु आहे."
"वा, अभिनंदन, कुठे चाललायेस? आणि कधी आहे लास्ट डे?"
"थॅन्क्स, अजून दोन आठवडे आहे मी तुला त्रास द्यायला."
"काय? दोन आठवडे? आणि तू आता सांगतोयेस? कुठं चालला आहेस हे तरी सांगणार आहेस का?"
मी डोळे मोठे करत विचारलं.
"सिटी ग्रुप"
"वॉव!! मग तर काय, मस्त हाईक मिळाली असेल, ग्रेट, कॉन्ग्रॅट्स. चांगली ऑपॉर्च्युनिटी मिळाली आहे. आता मीच एकटी राहते की काय इथे असं वाटायला लागलंय?"
"तुझं काय जीना यहा, मरना यहा आहे की काय?"
"नाही रे, बघू ह्या अप्राईझल मध्ये काय मिळते ते, त्यावरून मी ठरवेन." मी एक उसासा सोडत माझं दरवर्षीचं स्टॅन्डर्ड उत्तर देवून टाकलं.
"वोक्के, ब्येष्ट ऑफ लक.."
"ठीक आहे,.चल मी निघते, बसची वेळ झाली, बाय, उद्या बोलू."
"बाय"
बाहेर पाऊस वाढतच होता. कशीबशी छत्री बंद करत मी पुढच्या सीटवर बसले.पण सागरशी बोलल्यापासून एकच विचार सारखा मनात घोळत होता. ह्या कंपनीत जवळजवळ चार वर्षे होत आली.माझ्याबरोबर जॉईन झालेल्यांपैकी फक्त मी आणि तेजूच उरलो होतो आता. अगदी सागरसारखे मला ज्युनिअर असलेले लोक सुध्दा सोडून गेले होते, चालले होते. असं नाही की मी बाहेर कुठे प्रयत्न केला नाही. पण, कुठे मनासारखे पॅकेज मिळत नव्ह्ते, तर कुठे मनासारखे काम.आणि चार वर्षं इथं राहून एक प्रकारच्या कम्फर्ट झोन मध्ये आल्यासारखं वाटत होतं, अगदी मागच्या सलग दोन अप्राईझल मध्ये प्रमोशन साठी डावलून सुध्दा. पण असा कुणी ओळखीतलं निघून चाललं की, असं विचारांचं चक्र मनात फिरत राहायचं.मला एक कळत नाही, एखादी ओळखीची व्यक्ती उद्यापासून नसणार ह्याचं दु:ख जास्त असतं की, तुम्हाला का अशी संधी मिळत नाही ह्याचं? आता ह्या वर्षी आर या पार, एकदा बालाशी स्पष्ट बोलून काय तो निर्णय घ्यायचाच असा मी दरवर्षीप्रमाणे निर्णय घेतला.
कानात रेडिओ मिर्चीच्या आर जे ची वायफळ बडबड, बाहेरचा ट्रॅफिक जॅम, जोरात कोसळणारा पाऊस, आणि त्याच्याहूनही वेगाने मनात कोसळणारे विचार, आजूबाजूचे वैतागलेले, झोपाळलेले आणि म्लान चेहरे, मला सुध्दा कधी झोप लागली कळालंच नाही.
(क्रमशः)

मेंदीच्या पानावर - २

2011-04-24T10:53:00.000-07:00

"भले बुरे जे घडून गेले, विसरून जाऊ सारे क्षणभर, जरा विसावू या वळणावर, या वळणावर.."
इअरफोन्स कानात कोंबून गाणं ऐकता ऐकता माझा डोळा कधी लागला काही कळालेच नाही. अचानक ड्रायव्हरने करकचून ब्रेक दाबला आणि मी दचकून जागी झाले. किलकिले डोळे करत बाहेर पहिल्यावर लक्षात आलं की बस ने भुसारी कॉलनीचा स्टॉप केव्हाच सोडला होता. मी झोपेत थेट पौड फाट्यापर्यंत पोचले होते.

"अरे देवा..." म्हणत मी ताड्कन उठले, कशीबशी बॅग पाठीवर अडकवून, विस्कटलेले केस ठीक ठाक करत मी खाली उतरले.

आता परत आमच्या फ्लॅटवर कसं जायचं? बाहेर पावसाचं चिन्ह होतं, रिक्षावाल्याने चांगलंच कापलं असतं.मग काय, वाट पाहीन पण पीएमटीनेच जाईन म्हणत नाईलाजाने बसची वाट पाहत थांबण्याशिवाय काही पर्याय नव्हता. ह्यादरम्यान मी स्वतःला हजार शिव्या देवून घेतल्या होत्या. पण आज नशीब जोरावर दिसत होतं, संध्याकाळी आठ वाजता चक्क बर्‍यापैकी मोकळी बस मिळाली, पीएमटीचा सौजन्य सप्ताह सुरू असल्याच्या थाटात कंडक्टरने जराही कटकट न करता सुटे पैसे परत केले आणि व्यवस्थित स्टॉपवरच बस थांबवली. मी खुशीतच खाली उतरले. एव्हाना वीजा चमकायला लागल्या होत्या. मी झपाझप पावलं टाकत निघाले, आमची बिल्डिंग रोड पासून थोडी आत होती, आणि आत जाणार्‍या रस्त्यावर कधीकधी अंधार असायचा, मला तेव्हा खूप भीती वाटायची. पाऊस सुरू व्हायच्या आत मी घरी पोचले आणि सुटकेचा नि:श्वास टाकत घरी शिरले. ऋता नेहमीप्रमाणे मोबाईलवरच चिकटलेली होती. तिचं दबक्या आवाजतलं बोलणं ऐकून, मी हळूच तिला डोळा मारला, तिने लगेच जीभ बाहेर काढून दाखविली.

तासाभराने माझं आवरल्यावर, ऋताने जेवायला हाक मारली. आज मावशींनी मस्त भेंडीची भाजी केली होती. आज ऋताचं मात्र जेवणात लक्ष दिसत नव्हतं, नेहमी हिच्या तोंडावर टेप चिकटवावा की काय असं वाटावं अशी अखंड बोलणारी ऋता आज काहीच बोलत नव्हती. मी काही बोलल्यावर सुध्दा अगदी तुटक तुटक उत्तरं देत होती.नक्कीच काहीतरी बिनसलं होतं. मला तिची थोडी काळजीच वाटू लागली होती. ऋता तीन वर्षांपासून माझी रूम पार्टनर होती, तसं तिच्या आणि माझ्यात कॉमन असं काही नव्हतं, तिचा स्वभाव माझ्या अगदी विरूध्द, सतत हसणारी, चेष्टा मस्करी करणारी, कायम मित्र मैत्रिणी, गेट टु गेदर्स, पिकनिक, पार्टीज एन्जॉय करणारी ऋता माझी पक्की मैत्रीण कधी झाली हे समजले सुध्दा नाही. आणि म्हणूनच तिचं गप्प राहणं खटकत होतं, कारण मागच्या वेळी, तिच्या अप्राईजल रिझल्ट नंतर एक दोन दिवस ती अशीच गप्प गप्प होती, पण सध्या तर अप्राईजल सिझन पण नव्ह्ता.
हात धुतल्यावर दोघी हॉलमध्ये बेडवर बसलो. मी लगेच विषय काढला.
"काय ऋताबाई, आज काय झालंय? गोर्‍या गोबर्‍या गालांवर एकही खळी पडली नाही संध्याकाळ पासून"
"काही नाही गं, थोडं डोकं दुखत होतं" उसनं अवसान आणत ऋता बोलली.
"ए ऋते, गप्प बस. खरं सांग, काय मला सांगण्यासारखं नाही का?"
"अगं हा स्वप्नील गं.." बोलता बोलता ऋताचा आवाज अचानक रडवेला झाला.
काहीतरी सिरिअस प्रकार वाटत होता. तसे दोघांचे अधूनमधून रुसवे फुगवे चालायचे, पण ऋताला अशी रडकुंडीला आलेली मी कधी पहिली नव्हती.
"काय झालं, काय म्हणतायेत आमचे भावी भाऊजी, काय खूप उतावळे झालेत की काय?"
मी थोडं वातावरण हलकं फुलकं करण्यासाठी विचारलं?
"अगं काय सांगू? तुला माहितीये ना ह्या वीक मध्ये फुल्ल लोड होता प्रोजेक्ट मध्ये. काल तर गो लाईव्ह होता. रात्री खूप उशीर झाला निघायला. मला माझ्या टीएल नेच घरी सोडलं. बस्स, म्हणूनच ह्याचा पारा चढला. तू त्याच्याबरोबर येवढ्या रात्री आलीसच कशी? असं म्हणत माझ्याशी भांडतोय तो, म्हणतोय की मी काय मेलो होतो का? आता मला सांग, हा काय हडपसर वरून येणार होता का हिंजवडीला मला न्यायला?"
मला पहिल्यांदा ऐकून धक्काच बसला. स्वप्नील सारखा चांगला मुलगा असं काही वागेल यावर माझा विश्वासच बसेना.
"अगं तसं नसेल गं, काहीतरी गैरसमज झाला असेल." मी तिला समजावण्याच्या उद्देशाने म्हणाले.
"नाऽऽहीऽऽ. असं काही पहिल्यांदा होत नहिये. गेले काही दिवस मी पाहतीये, स्वप्नील खूपच पझेसिव्ह होत चाललाय. माझं माझ्या मित्रांशी, कुठल्याही मुलाशी जास्त बोललेलं त्याला खपत नाही, ह्याचा फोन मी चुकून रिसिव्ह केला नाही तरी खुप खोदून खोदून प्रश्न विचारतो. मागच्याच वीकेंडची गोष्ट, आम्ही दोघे डेक्कन च्या मॅक्डी मध्ये बसलो होतो, तिथे माझा कॉलेजचा एक मित्र अथर्व भेटला, मला पाहून अगदी गर्दीतून वाट काढत काढत आमच्या टेबलापाशी आला. फक्त एखाद दुसरा मिनिट होता, फक्त हाय हेलो करून निघून सुध्दा गेला. मग काय, आमच्या साहेबांचा मूड लगेच ऑफ. पूर्ण वेळ फक्त अथर्वचीच माहिती काढून घेत होता, तू त्याला कशी काय ओळखतेस?, तुमची मैत्री अजून आहे का? वगैरे, वगैरे..आता हे गुण आहेत, लग्न झाल्यावर काय होणार आहे कुणास ठावुक?"
बोलता, बोलता ऋताचे गोरे गाल लालबुंद झाले होते. मला तर हे सगळं विचित्रच वाटत होतं. ऋताचं लग्न आईवडिलांनीच ठरवलं होतं. स्वप्नील मला तरी खूप साधा, सरळ, लाजरा-बुजरा मुलगा वाटायचा. तो ऋताला भेटायला यायचा तेव्हा खालूनच बोलून निघून जायचा, चुकून सुद्धा कधी वर यायचा नाही. मला जेव्हा जेव्हा तो भेटला, तेव्हा अगदी अहो, जाहो करून बोलत असायचा, शेवटी मीच ऋताकडून रागवून रागवून अरे तुरे वर बोलणं आणायचे. आणि जे काही ऋताने आज सांगितलं ते ऐकून मी सुन्नच झाले होते. तिला काही तरी समजवायचं म्हणून मी बोलून गेले.
"अगं स्वप्नील चांगला मुलगा आहे. तुमचं लग्न आता दोन महिन्यांवर आलं आहे. काही गैरसमज असतील तर आत्ताच बोलून मिटवून टाका. मला खात्री आहे सगळं व्यवस्थित होईल"
"तसं झालं तर चांगलंच आहे." एक सुस्कारा टाकत ऋता पुटपुटली.
मी तिला समजावत होते खरी, पण कुठेतरी मलाच खुप उदास वाटू लागलं होतं. खरोखर, एकविसाव्या शतकात सुध्दा ही पुरूष मंडळी केवळ पुढारलेपणाचं ढोंग आणतात, आणि आतून मात्र तेवढीच बुरसटलेली आणि मागासलेली असतात, आणि असलं काही ऐकून मला तर ह्या असल्या मुलांचा आणि पुरुषी प्रवृत्तीचा जास्तच तिरस्कार वाटायला लागायचा, आपण पुरुष द्वेष्टे तर बनत चाललो नाही ना अशी उगाचच शंका यायची. मी तशाच मनःस्थितीत उठून बेडरूम मध्ये गेले.कानांत इअरप्लग्स कोंबून संदीप खरेची गाणी प्ले केली आणि डोळा कधी लागला कळालंच नाही..
(क्रमशः)

मेंदीच्या पानावर - १

2011-04-08T22:07:00.000-07:00

मी तणतणतच क्युबिकल मध्ये शिरले आणि बॅग जोरात डेस्क वर आदळली.
"काय झालं मॅडम?", आपला जाड फ्रेमचा चष्मा नीट करत सागरने विचारले.
"हे मेलं ट्रॅफिक रे, जरा पुढे सरकेल तर नशीब, नुसता वैताग आणलाय."
"ओक्के, मला वाटलं ब्वॉयफ्रेंडाशी भांडण बिंडण झाले की काय :)"
"हा हा हा, कै च्या कै"
मी खुर्चीत नीट बसतेच आहे तोपर्यंत फोन कोकलू लागला..
"हॅलो"
"हॅलो गवरी, बाला हियर"
बाला, आमचा मद्राशी मॅनेजर, ह्या गाढवाने एकदा तरी माझं नाव व्यवस्थित उच्चारावं अशी माझी कळकळीची इच्छा होती.
"हाय बाला, टेल मी"
"व्हेअर वेअर यू गवरी, आई वाज लूकिंग फार यू"
अरे बोक्या, नेहमी नवाच्या ठोक्याला हजर असते, तर पुसटशी दखल ही घेणार नाही, आणि नेमका आजच टपून बसला होतास.
"सॉरी बाला, बस वॉज लेट टुडे ड्यु टु हेवी ट्रॅफिक"
"न्येव्हर माईंड, क्यान यू कम टु माय ड्येस्क फॉर अ मिनट? वी आर हॅविंग अ क्विक टीम मीटींग"
ह्या बालाला मधूनच टीम मीटींग नावाचा भंपक प्रकार करण्याचा झटका यायचा, ज्यात फक्त तोच काहीतरी अगम्य भाषेत बडबड करायचा आणि बाकिचे आपले हो ला हो करायचे.
आजची मीटींग थोडी जास्त वेळच चालली. बाला स्वतःच काहीतरी पीजे मारून, स्वत:चं थुलथुलीत पोट सांभाळत खदाखदा हसत होता आणि बाकी सगळे निर्विकार चेहर्‍याने माना हलवत होते.
तो मीटींगचा टाईमपास संपवून मी जागेवर आले. सागर महाशय कुठल्याश्या किंगफिशर मॉडेल चे फोटोज अगदी भक्तिभावाने पाहण्यात तल्लीन झाले होते. मी गालातल्या गालात हसत मी मी म्हणणार्‍या मेल्स चेक करायला घेतल्या. बाप रे, सकाळपासून अगदी इश्शुजचा पाऊस पडत होता!!!!

शी बाबा, अर्धा दिवस सरत आला तरी कामात मन काही लागेना. एकापाठोपाठ एक ईश्शुस, डिफेक्ट्स पाठच सोडायला तयार नव्हते. तेजू तीन वेळा पिंग करून कंटाळली आणि एकटीच जेवायला निघून गेली.भरीस भर म्हणून की काय आजूबाजूला हळूच चोरून पाहावे म्हटले तर, पलीकडे बसणारा सुजल सिंग ही आलेला दिसत नव्हता.उंच, गोरापान, वेल बिल्ट, रोज नवीन हेअर स्टाईल ठेवणारा, क्लायंट पुढे फाडफाड इंग्रजी झाडणारा, स्टायलीश बाईक चालविणारा सुजल सगळ्या टीम चा हिरो होता. त्याने नुसते हाय म्हटले तरी मनात गुदगुल्या होत असत.

मी तंद्रीत असतानाच पर्स मधून मोबाईल खणखणल्याचा आवाज आला. घरचा फोन? मी फोन घेवून बाहेर आले.
"हेलो"
"हेलो गौरी, किती फोन करायचा? कुठे होतीस? ", राग, चीडचीड, काळजी अशा मिक्स्ड फीलीन्ग्स वाला आईचा आवाज.
"अगं, फोन पर्स मध्येच राहिला होता, त्यामुळे लक्षात आले नसेल."
"बरं, जेवलीस का?"
"नाही अजून, काम होतं खूप, जाईन आता."
"काय हे गौरी? येवढं काय काम असतं? दोन वाजून गेले, अशाने आजारी पडशील."
आई एकदा बोलायला लागली ना थांबतच नाही.
"अगं जाईन गं आता. बरं ते राहूदे, बाबांची तब्येत कशी आहे?"
"आहे बरी." एक सुस्कारा सोडत आई पुटपुटली.
"डॉक्टरांनी हजारदा सांगितलंय चहा वर्ज्य करा म्हणून, पण हा माणूस ऐकेल तर नशीब. जाऊदे, ते चालायचंच, बरं मी काय म्हणत होते, सुमन वन्स आल्या होत्या काल."
"वा, छान, कशी आहे ती?"
"बर्‍या आहेत, अगं त्या सांगत होत्या, त्यांच्या नणंदेच्या चुलत दीराच्या मावस बहिणीचा मुलगा पुण्यातच असतो. कुठल्यातर सॉफ्ट्वेअर कंपनीत आहे म्हणे. मॅनेजर आहे, एक लाख पगार आहे ."
"बरं मग?", मला हळूहळू गाडी कुठे शिरणार ह्याचा अंदाज येवू लागला होता.
"अगं तुझ्यासाठी विचारत होत्या. चांगले लोक आहेत, शिवाय आपल्या सांगलीचेच आहेत. पत्रिका जमते का ते पाहावे का?"
"आई, काय गं!!! तुला सांगितलं ना, आता बास्स म्हणून. मी कंटाळलेय या सगळ्याला आता"
"असं काय करतेस? येत्या मे मध्ये अठ्ठावीस पूर्ण होतील तुला. म्हातारी झाल्यावर का लग्न करणार आहेस. अशा गोष्टी वेळच्या वेळी झालेल्या चांगल्या असतात @@*****क्ष्क्ष्क्ष्क्ष्..."
पुढचं सगळं आता मला व्यवस्थित पाठ झालं होतं- आम्ही काय भल्यासाठी सांगतो, तुझ्या वयाची असताना मी तुला शाळेत सोडायला जात होते वगैरे, वगैरे..
"आई, मला भूक लागली आहे, मला जेवायला जावूदे"
हा रामबाण उपाय नेहमी काम करून जायचा. लेकराला भूक लागलीये म्हटल्यावर जगातल्या कुठल्याही आईचे शब्दसुद्धा घशातच अडकतील.
"बरं बाई, जा. पण मी काय सांगितलंय ते लक्षात ठेव."
हुश्श.. आईला असं दुखावताना मला सुद्धा काही आनंद होत नव्हता, पण काही गोष्टी, काही प्रसंग खूप खोलवर मनात रुतून बसले होते.साधारण दोन-तीन वर्षांपूर्वी हा पाहण्याचा, कांदा पोह्यांच्या कार्यक्रमांचा प्रपंच सुरू झाला होता. कुठे मुलगी नकटीच आहे, जास्त सावळीच आहे, जरा जास्त बुटकीच आहे, तर कुठे मुलाला पगार कमी आहे, थोडा जास्तच उंच आहे, त्याच्या पणजीला कोड होते,तर कुठे मलाच मुलगा अगदी काका सारखा वाटल एक ना अनेक न चे पाढे पाठ झाले होते.आईचे खंडोबा पासून अगदी हाजी अली पर्यंत सगळ्याना नवस बोलून झाले होते. शेवटी एका ठिकाणी रडत खडत का होईना, ठरलं. अगदी साखरपुड्यापर्यंत. पण मधूनच मुलच्या आईने, अहो, काय ही मुलगी, साधी टिकली सुद्धा लावत नाही, असं नाक मुरडायला सुरुवात केली आणि आज्ञाधारक मुलानेही तीच भुणभुण लावली. माझ्याही रागाचा पारा चढला, आणि व्हायचे तेच झाले, सगळं फिसकटलं. तेव्हापासून या सगळ्या प्रकाराची शिसारी आल्यासारखं झालं होतं. हे सो कॉल्ड सुशिक्षित लोक सुध्दा छोट्या छोट्या गोष्टींत मन दाखवताना पाहून तर उबगच आला आणि एक खूणगाठ मनाशी पक्की केली की, आता नो मोअर कांदा पोहे आणि ठरवा ठरवी काय व्हायच ते होवूदे.
मी पर्स उचलली, वॉश रूम मध्ये जावून चेहरा स्वच्छ धुतला, केस नीट केले, पावडर वगैरे फासून, अ‍ॅट लिस्ट बाहेरून फ्रेश झाले आणि कॅन्टीन कडे निघाले
(क्रमशः)

Taste back home :)

2011-03-13T07:14:00.000-07:00

What started out as another laid back Saturday did end to be quite a feast for me. As usual, I woke up late, had a long, relaxed bath, heavy lunch and a compulsory weekend nap. And just as Indian batsmen put up a dismal show after master blaster's heroics against SA in a World Cup Match, no astrologer was needed to predict the result. So, I switched off the idiot box and decided to take a long walk. I hit the road to spend a quiet evening on noisy Pune streets.

Being a bizarre wanderlust, I started from my place in Kothrud, went all the way from Mhatre bridge, Dandekar bridge to Sarasbaug. Spent some moments at Ganesh temple and headed back. This time, I chose different route. I went via neelayam, Shastri Road, and just as I reached Deccan, almost 6 miles of walk started sending hunger alarms from stomach to brain.

So, I took right turn and went to J.M. Road, the true gourmet’s paradise. On a Saturday evening, on J.M. road, dream of a foodie comes true. And, just when I was confused with sheer opulence, it had to offer in terms of tongue ticklers, my eyes were caught by a long lost but familiar sight, a stall reading ‘Sangli Oli Bhel’, in the lane where crossword used to be, and wow my eyes were lit up!!!. On the way, there were couple of MH10s parked, so there were few already like me, who had come to get a sense of déjà-vu. It didn’t even take me a second to place the order - "Bhel-Puri". It’s prepared in unique Sangli style.Bhel puri completely takes up a different incarnation in Sangli. There, they have Panipuri's puris stuffed with tangy, spicy tamarind extract and a thinner green chilly, mint prawth. These puris are topped up with generous spread of Bhel, that too made in Sangli special style which again makes use of the spicy tamarind juices, served with ample amount of shev, onions, finely chopped cilantro and topped up with a whole boiled green chilly. Bhel is also made with different churmuras (puffed rice) from the ones in Pune. These are smaller, fatter churmuras made of short grained rice cultivated in and around Sangli. These churmuras in Bhel are not plain, bland ones, they are coated with a bit of turmeric and salt, this helps in enhancing the flavor. Every bite of it took me gradually backwards reliving some of the best moments I spent eating at every popular eating joints in Sangli, may it be Bhel outside Pratapsinh Udyan, or Pav bhaji at Sarovar, or hot Pohes at Ganesh, Vishrambaug, or Patties Pav at Safa's outside Walchand, Doodh Coldrink at ND's in Pushparaj Chowk etc. etc. etc..As every good thing comes to end, my bhel puri too had to finish and I had to start bak to Kothrud.

On my way back, I kept on wondering that like me, many of us have migrated to big cities like Pune, Mumbai, Banglore etc. for various reasons. As grown ups, we keep missing the places where we spent our growing days, the best days in our lives, although I have always speculated what do we miss the most, the places? or the people? Anyway, in today's age of internet, chats, androids, 3G mobiles, we take pride in saying that everything is just a click away. Still, have we ever realised that human being's basic necessity, "Food", still remains the unbeatable link that again and again keeps us connected to Home. Today, it was me who connected a little more. So, what you guys thinking? Just choose a quiet weekend, keep all your stress at bay, and visit all those numerous Kolhapuris, Khandeshis, Konkanis, Andhra messes etc. etc. eating joints spread all across Pune, Mumbai, Bangalore and serve your palette a glimpse of nostalgia :)

शाळा

2011-02-24T08:33:00.000-08:00

'शाळा' म्हणजे काय रसायन असतं हे शाळा सोडल्यावरच कळत असेल बहुतेक. ती खाकी चड्डी, तो चुरगाळलेला पांढरा शर्ट, ती पाण्याची व्याटरब्याग, अजून स्कूल बॅग न झालेले साधे सुधे दप्तर,तो अजून लंच बॉक्स न झालेला जेवणाचा डब्बा, ती मधली सुट्टी, ती हिरो जेट सायकल, ते वर्षानुवर्षे करकटकांची कलाकुसर सहन करत आलेले लाकडी बाक, ते एकमेकाना फेकून मारलेले कागदाचे बोळे, तो हवाहवासा वाटणारा मराठीचा तास,ते जीवघेणे बीजगणित आणि भूमिती ,ते नदीकाठचे ग्राऊंड, ते अनवाणी पायांनी तासन तास खेळलेले हाफ पीच क्रिकेट,शेजारी संथपणे वाहणारी कृष्णामाई, नदीपलीकडचे कायम हिरवेगार शेत आणि नारळाच्या बागा, उजवीकडे दिमाखात उभा असलेला आयर्विन पूल, अशा एक ना अनेक आठवणी, कितीक दिवस, कितीक क्षण. ह्या क्षणांचे कधीच मोल होवू शकत नाही.म्हणूनच कदाचित त्यांना 'सोनेरी क्षण' म्हणत असावेत!!!
--चैतन्य

Crushes Unlimited :)- part 1

2011-02-20T05:20:00.000-08:00

Having a crush is birth right of a man and at least I ,till date have tried my best to utilize it to the fullest :). People talk about big things like unselfish, platonic, genuine etc. etc. types of loves, which I have no knowledge of, however I swear to Romeo-Juliette, Laila-Majanu, Heer-Ranjha, Raj-simran etc. etc. that all my crushes have been truly sincere and genuine ones :) (please don’t ask me to define what’s a genuine crush now) although all these numerous crushes flying high like a brave eagle at their peak, finally crashed into an humble, helpless popats. But still, that does not deny me my birth right to have crush again and I keep paying my duties as a responsible citizen fully aware of my rights..

As it happens with most of us around, as far as I can remember, it all started in school. My first crush was my school teacher. In that age when you are oblivious of what you look to find in a feminine company; I was in awe of her sweetness and the fact that she was the only teacher who had spared me of punishments which I always deserved being one of the naughtiest kids. But, I guess, this chapter didn’t take long to get over as after few months, I never saw her in school. Later, I came to know that she was just a temporary teacher who had replaced one of the teachers who was on her maternity leave. Nevertheless, this marked the beginning of the crush – crash cat mouse game in my life :)

No sooner was the first tremor over, than a new one hit. She was my new classmate. I don’t really remember whether she was beautiful or not or rather I was too small to understand this aspect, but one thing was for sure that I simply loved her smile, her loud laughs, her standing first in every exam, her coming to school in a car, everything would just add oxygen to my breaths. Her pony tail, her school bag, her water bottle, pencils ,easers, sharpeners, literally everything seemed worth Gold to me. This cute little obsession did continue for quite a while, till we shifted our home and hence my school and as I would do number of times again, I had to move on.

The saga continued in bits and pieces throughout high school as well. I won’t really be talking about all but one. I am sure everyone’s adolescence whether man or a woman would have such velvety moments to share, no matter how much he or she tries to live in a state of denial. Ok, enough of philosophy, that’s never been my cup of tea :), let’s come to the point, those days, I was flying high with my brand new Hero Jet cycle which my father bought me as it was the cheapest option those days. Every day, going to school riding my bicycle was no less than a feeling of being in a Mercedes Benz. And bang!!!!, one day through by lanes of the school, I saw her delicately and carefully riding her even more beautiful BSA Lady Bird.. (Yes, gone are the good old days of Hero jets and Lady Birds, I wish I had a time machine:(). She was simply amazing, extremely fair, almost with a milk like complexion, had a very fashionable hair cut for a small town like ours, her shoe socks, nail paint, ear rings, bangles, everything matching her school uniform (hmm, I believe, when God created woman, he created her with one inherent quality – “The Fashion sense”). I took a second or two to come back to senses. I just felt like butterflies flying all around. The day marked the start of few radical changes. I started being extra careful about getting my uniform ironed well, neatly oiling and combing hair, brushing teeth extra clean, wiping and polishing shoes every other day. I would every now and then find an excuse to get out of classroom and wander in the veranda so that whenever I would pass her classroom, I would get a glimpse of hers because she used to sit in different classroom due to late admission. But I could never find words to talk to her. All my fruitless attempts to approach her always failed as my guts and my courage always eluded me owing much to my typically conservative middleclass Maharashtrian upbringing and even more conservative and the strictest school in the town where even talking to someone of opposite sex was considered a taboo . AS everything was going like middle overs in an One day match, suddenly started the powerplay of slog overs and we were engulfed by a daemon of SSC exams (These exams always kill the most precious days in our lives). There was absolutely no time for anything but papers, scores, results and futile merit list competitions. And as I secured admission to junior college, I had no new of hers except for the fact that she stood 3rd in the School. After some casual inquiries, I found that she moved to some bigger city may be Pune or Mumbai for further education ending my another longish loyal crush and leaving me wondering what if I was never as shy and prudish?
(To be Continued..)

विश्वचषक - काही प्रसंग काळजावर कोरून ठेवलेले..

2011-02-19T02:33:00.000-08:00

मित्रहो,

आजपासून दहाव्या क्रिकेट वर्ल्ड कपची सुरुवात झाली, आताच बांग्लादेशने टॉस जिंकल्याचे ऐकले आणि आम्ही त्या शकीब्याच्या नावाने बोटे मोडत टंकायला बसलो.च्यायला, इंदिरा आ़क्कांनी बांग्लादेशला काय भारताच्या गळ्यात खोडा अडकवायलाच जन्माला घातले की काय असाच आम्हाला प्रश्न पडतो. असो, धोनी आणि कं ला २००७ चे उट्टे काढण्याच्या शुभेच्छा..

आज आपण काही अविस्मरणिय प्रसंगांबद्दल बोलू, जे केवळ माझ्याच नाही, तर तमाम क्रिकेट दर्दींच्या ह्रदयावर अगदी लेण्यांसारखे कोरलेले आहेत.

१. प्रसाद वि. सोहेल
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Byl3zrlF4ZE

आहाहा!!!! वेंकटेश प्रसादने त्या उद्दामुद्दीन आमिर सोहेल ची दांडी वाकविली तो हा क्षण. प्रसाद भाऊ, अहो जयसुर्याने तुमची कितीही धुलाई केली असली तरी, केवळ ह्या चेंडूसाठी तुमची शंभर अपराध सुद्धा आम्ही पोटात घालायला तयार आहोत. सोहेल ने खिजविल्यानंतर, हा चेंडू टाकण्यासाठी तुम्ही तुमच्या शरीरात असतील नसतील अशा सगळ्या हाडांमधली ताकद एकवटली होती, ती फर्लांगभर मागे उडत गेलेली स्टंप तेच दाखवत आहे. आम्ही जर कुठल्या कुडमुडेवाडीचेही बादशहा असतो ना तरीही, आमचे अर्धे राज्यसुद्धा तुम्हाला बहाल केले असते. ह्या एका चेंडूने पाकिस्तानच्या उन्मत्त हत्तीला अक्षरशः लोळविले आणि भारताने बघता बघता सामना खिशात घातला..

२. गिब्स वर्ल्ड कप सोडतो
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJAp30jzHdE

हर्शेल गिब्स ने स्टीव्ह वॉ चा झेल नाही सोडला, तर वर्ल्ड कपच सोडला, गिब्स बहुतेक एरंडेलाची बाटली रिचवूनच उभा होता, म्हणूनच इतकी हागीनघाई झाली होती. ऑस्ट्रेलियाला त्यावेळी जिंकायला जवळजवळ १५० धावा हव्या होत्या आणि चार खंदे वीर तंबूत परतले होते. नंतर वॉ साहेबांनी त्यांच्या नेहमीच्याच स्टाईल मधे खेळत अप्रतिम शतक झळकावले आणि संघाला सेमी फायनल मधे घेवून गेले, ह्याला म्हणतात Captain's knock (अझर्या, ऐकतोयेस ना रे?)

३.ऑस्ट्रेलिया वि अफ्रिका १९९९ सेमी फायनल
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxVNtuDKsds&feature=related

हार्टब्रेक, हार्टब्रेक म्हणतात तो हाच का असा प्रश्न पडावा हा तो क्षण. शेन वॉर्नने निम्म्या अफ्रिकन संघाला धूळ चारल्यानंतरही क्लुसनर दादाने श्रीकृष्णाने एका करंगळीवर गोवर्धन उचलावा तसा एकहाती सामना खेचून आणला होता. शेवटच्या षटकात ९ धावा हव्या असताना, ह्या झुलु आयकॉन ने दोन खणखणीत चौकार मारून विजयावर जवळजवळ शिक्कामोर्तब का काय म्हणतात तेही केले होते, आणि मग अचानक तिसर्या चेंडूवर अगदी एखाद्या यजमानाने सत्यनारायणाचा प्रसाद वाटावा इतक्या सहजपणे फिल्डरच्या पुढ्यात बॉल सरकवून हा वेड्यासारखा पळत सुटला, आणि तिकडे तो कर्मदरिद्री डोनाल्ड सुद्धा बूटांना फेविकॉल लावल्यासारखा क्रीझ मधेच चिकटून उभा राहिला, अर्थात बॉल फिल्डरकडे गेल्यावर तो तरि काय करणार म्हणा? येवढ्यात त्या जात्याच कावेबाज ऑसींनी डाव साधला आणि सामना टाय करवून केवळ सुपर सिक्स मधील विजयाच्या जोरावर फायनल गाठली.

४.सचिन शोएब्याला धुतो, २००३ वर्ल्ड कप
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPguR7QoWIk

वा!! वा!! आणि वा!! हा क्षण तमाम भारतीयांनी देवघरातील फोटोसारखा ह्रदयातील मंदिरात जपून ठेवला आहे.. जितके बोलावे तितके थोडे, दशकातील सर्वोत्कृष्ट क्रिकेट क्षण असेच ह्याचे वर्णन करावे लागेल. पहा तरी, सचिनने किती सहज त्त्या शोएब्याचा मात्र १५० कि मी प्रति तास येणारा बॉल प्रेक्षकांमधे भिरकाविला.हा फक्त एक सिक्स नव्हता, तर तो रावळपिंडीचा खराटा, सगळी पाकिस्तानी टीम, पाकिस्तानी चाहते, सगळ्यांच्या तोंडावर एक सणसणीत चपराकच होती, इतकी सणसणीत की त्यामुळे आलेल्या भोवळीतून पाकिस्तान टीम आजतागायत सावरलीच नाही.अरे सच्या, भावा त्यो २००३ चा वर्ल्ड कप आपलाच हुता रे, ऐन वेळी त्या नतद्र्ष्ट बॉलर्स नी माती खाल्ली आणि होत्याची नव्हते केले :(

त्या २००७ च्या वर्ल्ड कप च्या आमच्या काहीच आठवणी नाहीत, तसेही लक्षात राहण्यासारखे त्यात होतेच काय?

यंदाचा वर्ल्ड कप भारतातच होत आहे, तर करोडोंच्या शुभेच्छा भारतीय संघाच्या पाठीशी आहेतच. मुंबापुरीच्या मैदानात, धोनी आणि संघाने विश्वचषक उंचवावा, हीच सिद्धिविनायका चरणी प्रार्थना :)

Women and Corporate World

2010-03-27T01:37:00.000-07:00

With all the little experience that I have got in the IT industry,I am daring to write this article. I guess, all these days have been full of training, knowledge transfers,hectic support work and above all an immense and keen observation. Being a male , obviously most of the study drifted towards women. Initially which came out of curiousity unknowingly evolved into serious observation

I don’t claim that it’s the final and eternal word. It’s just a neutral but a little biased observation and few conclusions drawn out of it. My overall impression was that women have much greater chance than men to succeed and progress in corporate world. There are many factors contributing to it. Few, I may have found out, few, I am yet to know.

So, this is an attempt to draw your attention to what I feel like having understood.

1.Hardwork.

Even under intense intoxication I can definitely tell that women are lot more hardworking than their male counterparts. They are always eager to study new things and give their more than 100% in any kind of work they have taken in hands. This attitude not only wins them good command but respect in the hearts of top management.

2.Communication Skills.

Women have always been better communicators. Compared to men, mostly women tend to have more command over language. Especially, now a days in corporate world ,the fluency over English which is considered to be a mandatory norm is a kind of quality that seems to be friendlier for women. All these attributes not only make women a good communicator but an extremely effective and impactful one.

3.Good interpersonal skills.

Women have amazing interpersonal skills. They are most patient listeners on the earth. You can very easily share your feelings with them and they will really give you an impression that they care for you where as men will not listen they will just hear as if being at some superficial level. Take a small example of someone in a team returning from holidays. A woman team mate will always compassionately inquire about his health, family members even if she doesn't know any one of them.

4.Appearance.

In corporate world, appearance does matter. We know that people are mad behind the façade only. And in this department, women are very clever. They have lovely dressing sense.You won’t see any woman dressed shabbily or dressed up in something which does not go with their persona.Good looking gals even have more advantage with their killer looks mixed with suitable attire , they make an overpowering and dominating combination.

5.Smartness.

This is the only quality which I would like to associate along with women only. Yes, I mean it. Women are much smarter than men. They know what to do right and what to do wrong. They know what to say right and not. They know how to impress bosses. They know how to seduce others for their own benefit. They know what they have and how to make most use of it either destructive or constructive causes. This is where they score and leave behind men miles back and this is the vital most attribute contributtting to to their success in the industry.

So, here goes my take on women and corporate world. Again, I want to make one thing pretty clear that this is not a verdict, this is just an immature observation with many flaws. I am hungry for you reviews and replies.

The Eventual

2010-03-26T22:23:00.000-07:00

Why does it happen that your mobile always rings when you are in washroom? But I had no choice, than to pick up as it was the phone I was badly waiting for.
"Hi Vivek, tell me", I said
" Hi Chaitanya, good news , you are through with the interview."
" Ohh, thanks. That's great"
" I have sent you an offer letter, just go through it and let me know your decision by COP today"
"OK, that's fine."
"OK, bye"
Hmm, after hearing the news, I was strangely amazed at my reaction. At that moment, I had to be elated, not exactly ecstatic, but at least pleased to an extent. But it was a vague sense of blankness that had enveloped me making me void of any kind of emotions even though it was almost the perfect offer I was looking for, fine work profile, good package and a better role too.
Why?? The answer was sheer fatigue, I was tired. Tired of waiting, tired because it wasn’t an easy bait, it was to say the least my fourteenth interview that eventually fetched me an offer. Aug 2008 to Oct 2009, 14 months and 14 interviews as far as I can remember. A series of bizarrely bitter experiences, travels through jam packed PMTs, and autos and sometimes those conjusted six sitters rubbing shoulders with all kinds of strangers from Hadapsar to Hinjewadi, from Vimannagar to Talavade, from Kharadi to Kothrud, during heaviest of rains or sticky humid summers, freezing Pune winters just to switch a bloody monotonous job!!!

During this entire period, the corporate entity that I started hating most was HR. I guess, the acronym should be changed to Harassing Resources rather than Human Resources. I must confess that I saw the blackest of faces of the HR operation during this phase. At some places, I have had experiences as in HR would call me for an interview, a panelist would come, give the most disinterested look in the world to my resume, ask me some frivolous questions and ask me to leave. HR would ask me to go stating he/she would get back to me on this and I would leave furious biting teeth and clenching fists. So much so, that at one place, I went through three rounds of interview successfully and I was told in the fourth and the final round that my skills were just not a suitable match for the requirement, it was some misinterpretation by HR that I was called for interview and all previous rounds were conducted by people not related to project. This was really ridiculous, a waste of my four travels to and fro Vimanngar and Hinjewadi phase 2. At some place they told me to keep the resume and leave. At some places, panelists ridiculed me for the kind of projects I worked with. These are just few examples, if I start telling each and every experience, one can rest assured that it would be a long book.

I must thank God that I wasn’t searching for the first job. I had a decent job albeit paying peanuts. At least I had a place to go and work after every rejection. But, the question still remains that why after all these incidents, I was still entertaining all the HR calls, and gearing up for every new interview? Was it a real bad need of a change? Was it for financial reasons? Or was it just my gigantic ego that was driving me to nooks and corners of the City? I am still wondering. And what was it that got me over this lean patch? I guess, one must go and look around the past. I had seen even worse days than these. When in college, sometimes I would not even have 4 rupees to repair punctured bicycle and would walk 2 kms to the college. Two kms may not sound a big distance by any stretch of imagination, however in the scorching March, April heat of Sothern Maharashtra, this was definitely a big deal for a thin boy weighing 50 Kgs . So, this time round, it wasn’t that too difficult. I was just a freak wondering for a change and nothing else. The flattering terms like “Moral Support”, “Fighting Spririt”, “Never Say Die Attitude” and attractive quotes sound well only in the books, when it comes to real life situations they sound nothing more than a Bullshit!!! In the hour of crisis, you are the biggest support of yourself.

I don’t know whether I really achieved a success, or just satisfied my ego or it was eventually an agreement to be tied up as a prisoner with another Capitalist regime just for handful of more wages. But one thing is for sure that people only see the Eventual, they don’t see the countless failures, numerous rejections and dejections, immeasurable frustrations and depressions. They hear loud laughs and see sweet smiles, but fail to hear the long mute weeps and see the hidden brackish tears!!!

My Drunkard Encounters

2010-01-10T05:54:00.000-08:00

(Disclaimer: - Nobody is supposed to get intoxicated after reading this article, if you do so, it’s at your own risk. Those who believe drinking is a sacrilegious affair and will be tempted to sue me for blasphemy can very well turn a blind eye. And those who love to enjoy the divine juices on earth can go on this dizzy ride)

Friends, ladies and (not so J) gentlemen, I am definitely one of those who believe that whether it’s good or bad , it’s right or wrong, a true or a false, everything is essentially a relative term. So, today let’s see through my lenses and analyze the some ever cherished aspects of different variants of manmade waters.

Let’s start with short, simple and sweet (or bitter?), the Beer। Beer is simple, filling, enjoyable, and appetizing and considered not so risky। A perfect bet for starters। She doesn’t really have any fuss about herself. She goes well with anything and everything without carrying any airs. You can simply buy a large bottle, a small pint or a glass, get a bag filled with chips and start on a carefree ride. And nothing better than having a beer , chicken fries to go along with, bunch of friends to share and have them watching an India Pakistan Cricket match. With every sip, one must enjoy more excitement and even more intoxication. Well, for beer, I must thank Mr. Mallya for Kingfisher that any other beer brand I tested felt like a water. Sometimes Foster or a Cobra can also work. But for a true Indian Beer fan, Kingfisher has always been at zenith.

Now, enough of simple and soft business. It’s time for Roughs and Toughs, for hard and callous, she is one and only The Rum. One thing is for sure is that Rum is not for the weak hearteds. It’s for those strong, loyal fans and staunch admirers who are willing to literally offer themselves to this ruggedly sensuous lady. That’s why, Rum has always been a favorite amongst Army men and it has always been associated with Royal Navy. Now a days, in market, there are a lot of Rum brands available. But the loyal old timers always owe their allegiance to the evergreen, the real Boss the Old Monk. Although, in recent past Mcdowell’s has been making some inroads, The Old monk still remains the ultimate seductress for Rum fanatics.

Let’s jump to my personal favorite, the pure white, the burningly hot, Russian lady, The Vodka. I am pretty much biased towards this truly exhilarating, crystal clear skinned chic. If wine was to be the Queen, then vodka would definitely be the Princess carrying an enigmatic charm around her. The sheer numbers of combinations one can make with vodka are endless. Vodka with lemonade, vodka with orange juice, vodka with ginger tonic, vodka with lime soda etc. etc. However, for an Indian palate, the combination that has worked wonders is Vodka with sprite. Add a large peg of vodka to your glass, add healthy amount of spite and squeeze one fourth of a lemon wedge in it and start having dead slow sips. Two such pegs and you are in a Boeing 747 travelling faster than the light. Be careful though, as a crash is always on cards after third such round. Whenever I hear the word Vodka, three words come to my mind “Smirn Off”, “Smirn Off” and then there is “Smirn Off”. Personally, I believe, it’s an inexcusable crime for me to be infidel with this long term lady love of mine and go for any other so called pleasing cheap brands. But any non conformists can try their hands at White Mischief, Romanov etc.

Our flowing journey now takes us to the most alcoholic region, the party favorite, the conversation builder, The Whiskey. The liquor has the highest percentage of alcohol amongst her cousins. Whiskey is for a real connoisseur. She is not meant for a hasty affair. It’s a cold winter night, an old friend for a company, two chairs and a table in the back yard of your farmhouse, Mohd. Rafi singing a ghazal in background and a bottle of whiskey, two glasses and plenty of ice to go with. You can spend hours sipping and loitering in nostalgia. Due to her peculiar nature, whiskey has always been a catalyst for authors, poets, singers and even philosophers. Whiskey is a confession of a criminal, she is a celebration of togetherness, she’s a solace of broken heart, and she is a medicine of injured mind. The most adored Whiskey variant all over the world that kisses your tongue, reaches your heart in flash and hits your brain hard is Scotch. Perhaps, the most destructive yet most sought after invention gifted by Scottish to World. The “Teachers” has always been on People’s favorite list in Indian subcontinent. However now a days, some brands like Signature, Royal Stag have been leaving their marks.

Hold on your breaths and tie the seat belts for now it’s time to conclude this fare with the Queen, the Empress, the supreme, the divine, The Wine. She was so irresistible that even the Gods could not detest her. She’s the only snobbish creature amongst her cousins who enjoyed a royal companionship. She was the only one who broke the barriers of the bar and was honored with a place in full five course dinner table and was served in specially crafted glasses for her. They say that 3 W’s invariably lead to crime, Wine, woman and Wealth. Well, Women and Wealth are still a long way away, so I am a one third of a criminal already. If loving wine wasn’t right, I would rather be wrong all my life. If the old fox in childhood story knew the art of making wine, he would never call the grapes sour, would he? I don’t want to categorize this divine drink into brands; The Gods would never forgive me for that. Whether it’s French or Italian, Australian or Chilean or Argentinean, the Queen is a queen.

Hope you have enjoyed this journey through my lenses. Let me close this with a note that “Enjoy your drink, but always drink responsibly and know your limits. Never drink and drive as there is always someone waiting for you home”.

Chaitanya

An Insider into scrum call

2009-02-22T07:28:00.000-08:00

Manish came to his desk, gasping for breath. It was almost 2:20 in the afternoon. He had missed the last bus, so had to take the auto to make sure he reached in time to attend the scrum call.
The phone was ringing on his desk. He hastily picked that up, “Hello, Manish”,” where have you been Manish?”, beaming voice of Rashmi echoed in his ears. “Ohh, sorry, I missed the bus today, yesterday, I was not feeling well. I had asked Ravi to set an out of office for me.”, “Yeah, I know, so how are you feeling today?” “Feeling better.”, “Ok, there are lots of issues today, what are you going to answer Rob?”, “Hmm, let me see, I have just arrived, will quickly go through mails and see”, “Ok, fine , see you on the call”
At 2:30 , Manish dialed the UK Meet me- Manish – has joined the conference- an announcement was made in a sweet voice.
“Hi there, hi Manish.”
“Hi Rob”, rather grudgingly said Manish.
“So, how are you feeling today?”
(To Himself – having a delivery manager like you is sufficient to make someone feel sick) “Yeah, fine, much better than yesterday”
“What was it actually?”
(Angrily to Himself –it was limfosocomma of intestine, why do you want to know?)”Ohh, nothing much, a throat infection.”
Laughing loudly, Rob said, “Hope you are not spreading any germs through telephone line.”
(To Himself – What’s so funny in this, you fool) Manish laughed even louder, “Be careful then Rob”
“Anyway, back to business. I saw an e-mail from testing team; they have raised a defect on us regarding one validation check failure, what’s that about?”
(And then, suddenly, communicator blinked, it was Rashmi,”dat ws our mistake” with a scared smiley, “Hmm”, Manish quickly replied”)
“Let me check Rob( Pretending to think), yeah, got it. This doesn’t seem to be an issue to me, I guess, it has already been delivered by us in recent code fix, I am not sure which deployment took place on testing environment”
(Again communicator blinked, Rashmi was surprised, “Wat r u sayin?”, “Get dat fixed ASAP and send 2 testin team.It’s quite easy, nd nt 2 say keep it offline”, he hastily replied).
Rob was furious by now.
“Does that mean this is some mistake by testing deployment team, I must reply to them for seeking clarification.”
(To Himself – Hold on Mr. Perfectionist, don’t get us into trouble)
“Rob, may be some new joiners have carried out the deployment. This may have happened due to some human error. Sometimes, we have to accept that. Anyway, I will talk to them and get this sorted out, no need to start a mail chain for this.”
“OK, that’s fine then. Just make sure this doesn’t happen in future.”
“OK, moving on, I have got a request from Titanic ASG for their weekend test environment deployment, can we provide that?”
(To Himself – This is the limit, how can they ask for a test deployment support from our team on weekends??And this dumb too is ready for that)
“Give me a moment Rob.”
(Communicator blinked, It was Rashmi again , “I won’t be here on weekends, goin out wid my hubby” A smiley. Manish replied, “ ohh, is it?Even me goin out wid my 4 GFs - poverty, failure, frustration and depression” A wicked smiley followed.)
Manish brought a forced smile on his face and tried to be as polite as possible, “Rob, I am not too sure what kind of support they would need from us because as far as I know, this release of theirs had no impact on us.”
“Ohh, is it? Ok, I will once again confirm from them.”
(To Himself – Thank God, now you god damn fool, go and talk to them)”Thanks Rob, that’s great of you.”
(Communicator was blinking again, this time it was Nishant, “dude, u hav pink floyd’s songs”, “who’s dat?”, Manish wrote with a smiley. “stop kidding dude, I need those 2day”, “k, in a call will check”, “k, thx”)
And he suddenly felt like hearing to Rob’s hoarse voice “Manish, are you there?Manish?”
Manish came to senses again, “Rob, I am sorry, I accidently went on mute, just didn’t get you, can you please repeat?”
“That’s all right, I have forwarded you one mail from Vighnesh wherein he is asking something.”
Manish found it really hard to control his laugh at the way Rob pronounced Vighnesh, “Okay, let me check…yup, he is asking whether the new code has been performance tested or not.”
“Yes, would you mind replying to that?”
(To Himself – yeah, why not? I am your father’s paid servant. Even if it’s all delivery mangers’ mail, I can still reply to that. What the hell are you doing as Deliery manager then?)
“Of course, I will reply to that.”
“Ok, thanks for that. Anyway, I guess we have discussed everything by now. If there is nothing else to highlight, your team can drop off. Does anyone have any issues to talk about?”
(To Himself – Attending this daily torture is a big issue in its own.)
“Hmm…(A short pause) ..No.”
“OK then cheers bye.”
“Thanks Rob, bye,” Few frill voices echoed.
Manish breathed a sigh of relief, went to E drive of his machine, looked for songs folder and started searching for Pink Floyd.
Chaitanya Kulkarni

मी केलेल्या काही निवडक चारोळ्या

2008-06-23T05:01:00.000-07:00

कधी कधी बान्ध भावनान्चे
अचानक फुटतात
पण अश्रू मात्र
पापण्यान्तच गोठतात...

अचानक येणारा पाऊस
आणि नकळत येणार्या आठवणी
सरता सरत नाहीत
दोघेही चिम्ब भिजवून जातात
शरीराला अन मनालासुद्धा...

प्रेम व्यक्त करायला
का असतात, शब्दान्ची बन्धने ??
पुरेशी नसतातच का कधी
तुझ्या-माझ्या ह्रदयाची स्पन्दने ??

मीही आता शिकलोय
मनातले मनातच ठेवायला
आणि उगाचच ओठावर
खोटे हसू खेळवायला

पावसाने थोडे तिच्या
येण्यासाठी थाम्बावे...
पण ती आल्यावर मात्र
मनसोक्त बरसावे...

आयुष्यावर हसता हसता
हळूच आयुष्य माझ्यावर हसून गेले
आठवणीन्च्या पावसातील दोन थेम्ब
नकळत डोळ्यान्तून सान्डून गेले

कवितांवर कधीच
भुलायचं नसतं
कारण कवितान्च्या जगात
सगळंच कही खरं नसतं

व्याकरणाचे नियम मी
सहसा पाळत नाही...
कारण प्रत्येक गोष्ट साच्यात बसविणं
मला कधीच जमत नाही....

What goes around, comes around

2008-06-17T23:03:00.001-07:00

At 3 A.M., it was dark, chilly and stormy. An irritating blanket of peace seemed to have covered the city of Pune. Manish was driving the bike on deserted street frantically. He was on a real high. It seemed like all the brain scratching, all the speculation and all the midnight oil which was burnt since last week had eventually paid off. Manish had just fixed an extremely critical bug which could have cost the client millions of bugs everyday in virtually no time especially when he knew nothing about the entire project just a week back. A major bug, which was introduced in the last delivery by his colleague Rashmi which had taken the entire system to a catastrophe. It created a complete havoc throughout the management. Each and everyone in the team, ranging from developer, tester to senior managers were taken left and right by the top officials.
It was the time when Ramesh, the Project Manager turned to Manish. He called Manish and said, “Manish, This is a litmus test for you. I know it’s difficult but not at all impossible for the person with your talent even though it’s a completely new scenario for you and it’s one the most complicated systems , but I am sure you are the guy who loves challenges.” And indeed, Manish was never going to let this opportunity let go out of his hands. From the word go, he started working on it like a fanatic.
Manish was known to be the most talented, yet very helpful and down to earth guy in the team. He was known for his excellent technical skills and calm nature. For any kind of difficulties his colleagues faced, he was there to help them in a flash. But in spite of his extra ordinary skills and competencies, he was always overlooked by his manager in the appraisals. He was working with this team since last two years, still he wasn’t considered for promotions.Leave apart promotions, he had to struggle even for ratings. He did not get any onsite opportunity either as his beautiful female colleagues were preferred who always succeeded in winning the heart of the Manager.Ramesh was very well aware of Manish’s talents, still he wasn’t willing to recognize him as Manish was never one of those who always flattered him which he liked a lot. But as he knew, Manish’s capabilities, he was never willing to leave him as well. Manish had almost made up his mind to leave the job, and he got this exciting opportunity and wow, he nearly extracted Gold out of it!
And now, he was on top of the world, he was riding at the speed of jet with lucrative words like appraisals, high ratings, promotions, onsite opportunities, awards, recognitions flashing through his mind. And suddenly, out of nowhere a truck emerged with a virtually supersonic speed and before Manish could even understand what was happening, went crushing passed him!!!!
Manish slowly opened his eyes and found himself standing in a long queue, which went up to a tall, dark and handsome guy who was sitting on a Sinhasana and wearing an attire which he had seen the people from mythological movies and T.V. serials. There was another studious looking guy standing next to him and he was holding a book from which he was reading something. When Manish looked around he saw diseased, dilapidated people being subjected to inhuman atrocities by some extremely dark and monstrous guys. Those people were being beaten up by thorny metal rods, thrown into boiling oil, forced to eat stinking flesh. The atmosphere was full of cries and moans of these creatures made of flesh and blood. Recalling all the stories he had heard, all the descriptions he had read and mythological movies he had seen, Manish came to conclusion that he was in ‘HELL’ and now brought to Chitrgupta and Yamaraj to get the final verdict While waiting, he started wondering what sins could a soft hearted and helpful person have committed to have been brought to hell?Eventually, his turn came, Chitrgupta looked at him curtly and started reading the data of his sins. ”He was an extremely cunning guy, from his childhood, he loved bullying the people and taking their advantage…” ”What the hell is this ?”, Manish asked angrily, but Chitragupta snapped, “You are not allowed to talk before I am finished” , and he continued , “He always maintained good contacts with rich and influential people in the society and his workplace but always looked down on his juniors and those who did not flatter them. His good contacts with seniors also earned him managerial position. But as a manager also he was extremely unfair and biased. He always wanted boot lickers around and especially favored good looking female employees and always overlooked the competent and hardworking guys who did not fawn him. So much so, that even today, he had plans to ruin the appraisal of one of his team members who had just saved him from severe project loss…” , “Enough!!!!!”, Manish cried out loudly, he just burst into anger which he was holding onto for quite a while. “Whom are you talking about?? These are all completely baseless and false allegations, you should better check your records and then speak. Your system seems to be quite similar to our government. First of all, I deny all the allegations of being cunning, a fawner bla bla bla. And again, I have never been a Manager at any instant of my life, leave apart ruining anybody’s career or appraising someone. Also, Had I ever been a manager, I would have never committed such shameless acts. I simply don’t understand whom and what you are talking about.” Surprised by this sudden outbreak, Yamaraj just raised an eyebrow and gave Chitrgupta a questioning look. Puzzled by Manish’s genuine protest, Chitragupta hesitantly asked him, “You are Mr. Ramesh Batuja, aren’t you?” Manish felt like having been thrown from Eiffel tower, it was like , the whole hell was revolving around him.”No almighty, No.It wasn’t me , it was my Project Manager!!!!!”. It was the moment of shock for both Yamaraj and Chitragupta. Yamaraj Frowned , “Chitragupta, this seems to be a case of mistaken identity. Let’s recheck all our records, call for a meeting and then take a decision.”
“You have been called to Yamaraj’s cabin “, A dark woman came and told Manish. With a frustrated mind and body, Manish just labored himself to the cabin. As he entered, Yamaraj smiled and said gently “Come son, have a seat”. Manish was amazed at such a cordial voice. Then slowly, Yamaraj started speaking, “Son, First of all I apologize for the fatal mistake committed by our officials. I have confirmed from Chitragupta that Not you, but our manager was supposed to die today, but as Yamadootas took you as Ramesh, they took your life. You were supposed to live for much longer and lead an extremely successful career ahead after leaving your current job. This is our mistake and I take a complete responsibility of it”. Manish grinned and said “My life has already been finished now and now there is no use to listen to what was in store for me in the future”. Yamaraj again smiled , “Don’t be disappointed son. Nothing is over yet, in fact it’s just a beginning for you.” Puzzled was Manish, he asked, “How cum?”. Yamaraj said “Son, No one can be pardoned for any rubbish he has committed, your manager recorded one the highest number of sins in recent times, don’t you want to give that back to him ??” Even more puzzled, Manish asked, “How can I do that?”. Yamaraj said , “May not be in this life, but definitely in the next life, son. In the next birth, we are going to place you as manager and you manager, Ramesh as the developer to work under you. And you will be free to play all those tricks that he played with you and to harass him to the fullest. Moreover, you will be forgiven for all those sins as a compensation of mistake of our officials. It’s the best I can offer you to correct our mistake.” Manish was literally in tears “Thanks, thanks a lot almighty”. Yamaraj blessed him, “Go son and start your new life, my blessings will always with you.”40 years later…..
At 3 A.M. streets of New York were deserted, It was a bitter cold, snowing and showing early signs of storm, Tony was driving his old car frantically………………

Chaitanya Kulkarni